my daddy always bully me! i was telling aunty zhu that my dad very bad. he keep going around asking his fren i fat hor i fat hor. then nevermind. at home he also sae i fat. example last night, he came back and sae he bought supper ask me to eat. and when i eat, u guess wad he sae? supper very fattening. shouldnt eat supper. u alreadi so fat still eat. >.< super angry. wah lao. wad he wan sia. eat also he ask me eat. then after tat sae i fat! then aunty zhu sae my dad is trying to tell me eat, but dun eat so much bcos fattening. but the way he sae it not like that lor.

receive his letter again. this time, no feel. jus feel even more sian. realli realli dun feel like writing to him. bcos will be another of my unhappy letter again. for wad? quarrel thru letters super idiotic lor. and i bet those people who are reading the letters are laughing like mad. but i realli cant b bothered. he saes that we've been thru alot during this period. i told aunty zhu, it was ME who went thru alot during this period. wad does he haf to go thru? aunty zhu sae, no smoking, no freedom, no tv. i suffer lehs!

he sae that he's being realistic. THEN I NOT REALISTIC AH? after i gif birth i alreadi bcome veri realistic. so realistic that i can tell a guy straight in the face, cannt den dun come and tell me u wan yang me. no such ability den dun come and tell me u wan to share my burden. im no longer the gei siao girl who will pretend and go one round tell u something. i go straight to the point. 一针见血 ok! fcuk up.

when im still pregnant i even thought of hw our wedding will be like etc. but when darius is born, i no longer thought abt tat. in fact i onli thought of he can support us. which i know he cant. he sae if i convert to part time and he's onli in NS, then definitely we cannt survive. but he can tell me that we can survive if i work and he study while taking internship. fcuk him. and the reason why he choose to study nw? bcos nw the expenses for darius is lower. ask him to go bang wall and die. im realli sick and tired of it. can i jus ignore everithing from nw on and pretend ive never know him? i cant. bcos his name is in the BC. it's my mistake. slap me.

ive lost trust in relationship bcos of him. because i love him wif all my heart. trusting him again and again. yet betrayed every single time. but i thank him. bcos of him, im who im nw. strong and independent.